Sunday, December 16, 2007
Celebrity Lego Sets
My favourite Lego Set and kept for the last Lego Set of 2007 - Heather Mills Action Set with Police Motorbike. Ho Ho Ho! Have a great Festive season people. See you next year!
Christmas Special Newsletter
Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Christmas Special 2007
http://www.friendsofcelebrities.com
Well, the year is nearly over. It’s been one of the greatest years for celebrity gossip and perfect for the first year of the Friends of Celebrities. Thanks for sharing it with me. Next year is going to be bigger and better. Watch out for some special changes in the January newsletter. And with them, I’m sure a whole bunch of celebrities will be signing up to meet you all. Until then, let’s remind ourselves of some of the best bits of 2007, with a miniature FoC awards ceremony. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, see you in 2008!!!
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BEST CELEBRITY LEGO SET
Go to the homepage friendsofcelebrities.com my favourite of the lego sets of gold digging Heather Mills. (Don’t forget she lost her leg in an accident with a police motorbike.)
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BEST LOONEY
Heather Mills McCartney showed how delusional she was once again this week, with a pathetic attempt to convince the world how poorly she has been treated. She compared herself to Princess Diana and mother of missing 4 year old Madeleine McCann in a sad attempt to gain sympathy. She whinged about her £1.5million legal costs. She begged people to believe she didn’t want any money. And claimed she was thinking of suicide. Just because you say it, doesn’t make it true. No matter how many times you repeat it. It really back-fired and she looked like an idiot. We want her to get in touch so we can help her get back to her roots.
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WORST KEPT SECRET
Fashion designer Roberto Cavalli has confirmed the rumours. Phew! Although, J-Lo herself and hubby have still refused to confirm the rumours, preferring people thought she was just plain fat.
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BEST ADOPTION
Both Madonna and Angelina Jolie are both in the market for a new accessory baby. Madonna is just waiting for the adoption agency to get back to her. Angelina has already made enquiries and jetted off to Africa to do a bit of window shopping. It’s a good thing. As long as they are doing it for the right reasons. Good job Michael Jackson isn’t following the trend. There would be an outrage!
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BEST PICTURE
Butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth, squeaky clean super star Vanessa Hudgens isn’t any of those things anymore. When will famous people learn that they just have to not do the things we all enjoy (like taking nude pictures of ourselves) to protect their careers? Apparently it was taken for boyfriend and co-star Zac Efron. But the pics seem to clash with Disney’s plans for the starlet.
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BEST COUPLE
For all the hoo-ha surrounding Amy Winehouse and hubby’s alleged heroin use, it turns out that Blake is a bit of a bad egg after all. He was due to go to court after assaulting a chap outside a pub. He had the bright idea of offering the guy £200,000 ($400,000) to drop the charges. However, the cunning guy went straight to the police and newspapers. The sentence for this serious crime is up to life imprisonment. He won’t get that but it could be a long time. Also, there will be claims that Amy knew nothing about it. Hmmmm, do you believe that?
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WORST LIAR
Heather Mills has been fired by her own lawyers. She apparently kept calling her main guy while he was grieving and ignored everything they told her to do. The madwoman doesn’t care about what’s right, just what she wants. She claims to have been taping conversations with Paul which prove that he called Heather a one legged bitch. (Sounds about right to me.) She also says ‘it's clear from the tape that Paul has apologized for the marriage breakdown and how he treated her.’ Well, that sounds like he is a very nice man.
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BEST FAD
Bottom Facials. La-la land’s latest craze is to have a lovely exfoliating face massage – on your ar*e. I suppose it’s designed to stop you looking sh*t.
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BEST DEATH THREAT
A fundamentalist terror group in the Gaza Strip have got a bee in their bonnet with celebrities, specifically Madonna and Britney Spears. Leader Mohammad Abdel-Al stated in a book that: ‘If I meet those whores, I will have the honour to be the first one to cut the heads of Madonna and Britney Spears.’ I reckon he is just upset because he can’t get any tickets for their shows.
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BEST BONK BUST
Just what was Sting doing, coming out of famous Hamburg Brothel, Relax Bordello? Although his publicist was un-available for comment, I am positive that the positive spin put on this will be the old classic – researching for a film. Watch this space.
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BEST COMEBACK
Paris Hilton took time off from her extensive charity work (that we never hear anything about) in order to take time out to seriously PAR-TAY! She treated onlookers to a sexy and lengthy pole dance in a nightclub. There must have been a mirror close by for her to watch herself.
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BEST BREAKDOWN
One hell of a week for Amy Winehouse. Doing drugs with a hooker, attacking her boyfriend, throwing her brother (who was sent to help her) out of her hotel, having a screaming match on one of London busiest streets, making up, running out of a restaurant and getting thrown out of her hotel suite. Plus her family are telling everybody who’ll listen that their daughter is going to die soon. The only good thing that happened to her was probably injecting heroin. And that is a BAD idea. Amy, we’re here for you, girl.
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BEST CELEBRITY SEARCHES 2007
1. BRITNEY SPEARS!
2. Paris Hilton
3. Beyonce
4. Lindsay Lohan
5. Fergie
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Be my friend at www.myspace.com/friendsofcelebrities
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Thanks to everyone for signing up. Please forward this message to your friends or tell them to sign up. Better to get on the mailing list earlier than later! If you have any tips or stories email me at john@friendsofcelebrities.com and I’ll see you all in the new year.
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL CELEBRITIES AND THE FRIENDS OF CELEBRITIES!!!!
John
Founder of Friends of Celebrities
Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
The final answer of the years Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz is the queen of celebrity gossip - going for seven decades and seven husbands and still counting - Elizabeth Taylor. See you next year for even more Screwed Up Celebrities!
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Celebrity Lego Sets
It's gun toting Phil Spector! He apparently fired a gun next to John Lennon's ear in anger. To which Lennon said, "If your gonna kill me Phil, just kill me. But don't damage my ears, I need them."
Spice Girls Comeback
Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Monday10th December 2007
http://www.friendsofcelebrities.com
It’s a positive note this week as the much criticised Spice Girls comeback tour kicked off to much fanfare. The word is that it’s a great show. Here’s all the other news from the greatest show on earth – The Friends of Celebrities Newsletter…
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Amy Doing More Drugs than Ever
Why doesn’t anybody ever get on with their mother-in-law? In Amy Winehouse’s case it’s probably because she has just told the world that Amy is neglecting her jailbird husband and is taking more drugs than ever. Nice.
Luckily for Amy her friend and fellow crack-head Pete Doherty has been coming round to her house at 4 in the morning for a session. We hope that’s a jamming session, rather than a huge session of coke. What was that big bag of white powder photographed in Amy’s car trunk? I’m talking about the back of her car, of course not her nose.
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Revolver Re-loaded
Madonna’s hubby Guy Richie is re-releasing his huge flop of a movie Revolver in the U.S. Lets hope no one remembers it was awful, although it was so bad they probably will. Lets hope he doesn’t shoot himself in the foot second time around.
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Celebrity Lego Sets
Go to the homepage friendsofcelebrities.com to see the newest celebrity lego set of gun-toting Phil Spector. Bang!
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Brad Pitt Eco-Warrior
Good on you Bradley. While your wife is saving the children of the world you are making a difference in the hurricane hit area of New Orleans. He has put his own cash into a project that will design and build flood proof homes. Go Brad!
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Heaven Knows Who’s Miserable Now
Pop Diva Morrisey, famed for being super miserable and pretentious (as well as writing some amazing songs) is suing a music newspaper. He claims the NME took comments he made out of context in order to claim he was a racist.
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Mika Has Day Off School
Children’s party entertainer Mika has cancelled his UK tour because of a virus. The squeaky star had a note signing him off by his mum.
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Relationships On:
Lewis Hamilton + Nicole Scherzinger (in his dreams)
Robbie Williams + Ayda Field
Alex Zane + Sadie Frost
Jessica Simpson + Tony Romo
Relationships Off:
Hulk Hogan + Linda Hogan
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This Weeks Top Celebrity Searches
1. Jessica Alba
2. Cameron Diaz
3. Jessica Simpson
4. Paris Hilton
5. Alicia Keys
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Be my friend at www.myspace.com/friendsofcelebrities
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Worlds Richest Dog Stalked
No, I’m not talking about Paris Hilton. The World’s richest dog, Troubles is living up to her name by receiving death threats. She is using false names and her food is made by top chefs.
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Jonathan Rhys Meyers handed a caution for his attempt to board a plane while drunk.
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Grooverider Heading for Jail
Last week we reported that the DJ had run into a spot of bother at Dubai Airport. It now looks like he could spend up to 4 years in jail after been caught smuggling a small quantity of marijuana and porn into Dubai in his record collection.
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Weekly Britney Crisis
It was a week like any other for the troubled star – with a huge crisis. Britney is reportedly being accused of multiple counts of multiple child abuse and neglect. And of course there’s another child on the way. Poor Britney. She’s needs a friend like us.
She also is being investigated for allegedly stealing £14,000 worth of fur coats from a designer and running over a Sheriff’s Deputy while driving away from court. Well, makes a change from a photographer.
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Lazy Lohan has been photographed all week with super heroes and their kids for a German magazine shoot.
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Scarlett Sues
Scarlett Johansson is suing an American magazine after it claimed she had plastic surgery on her nose. The star vehemently denies ever having any surgery and is against it. She is hot enough already, we think!
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And Hudgens Sued
Vanessa is being sued by an agent after they claim she took too long to turn down a contract. Ridiculous!
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Doherty Punched in the Face by Drug Nutter
Poor Pete. He moved to the countryside to get away from the drugs. But while having a quiet drink in his new pub the local drug dealer came in and punched him in the face. The man who neighbours say is a psycho shouted at Doherty to only buy his drugs from him. Nice.
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Lily Allen avoided her dad at the Comedy Awards this week despite both being present.
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Keifer Sutherland Behind Bars
He checked himself into jail this week to start his 48 day sentence for drink driving and breaking his parole. This means he’ll be spending Christmas in the slammer. No turkey for him then!
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Amy Sings the Blues
Although she has cancelled her tour for being a complete mess she did have time to play a short set at the Jazz Café. However, reports are that she was less than organised.
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Robbie Williams to Join Take That
We’ve heard the rumours before but word on the street is Robbie is ready to join his former band on tour. While Robbie’s career is flopping, the washed up boy band is taking the world by storm. Apparently Robbie wants a piece of the action. Despite having to pay half a million quid to their former manager this week after saying he stole money in his song lyrics.
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Goodfella Escapes Jail
Ray Liotta has been let off with a fine for dangerous driving. The gangster film star crashed his vehicle into two parked cars. Naughty, naughty.
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What a Shambles, Baby
The band Babyshambles had to get a guy in the audience to stand in for Pete Doherty after he failed to turned up. Maybe because he was buying drugs from the guy who punched him in the face.
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Lily Allen Get Mobile Phone Rebate
Lily made £140,000 for a 40 minute set this week. She boasted to the audience at Paper nightclub about being paid so much for the Nokia Christmas party, but it was worth it. They got a free bit of advertising right here on the Friends of Celebrities.
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And finally…
This week in England a man was arrested for faking his own death, returning after five years claiming he didn’t remember a thing. It’s not celebrity news, but interestingly he was travelling the world on a fake passport under the name John Jones. I just want it know that it wasn’t me, ok?
Thanks for signing up. Please tell your friends who haven’t signed up to get the newsletter and thanks to everyone who has been emailing me at john@friendsofcelebrities.com
See you next week and keep going to the website for more great stuff coming very soon.
John
Founder of Friends of Celebrities
Friday, December 7, 2007
Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
Can you get the Screwed Up Celebrity this week? Good luck! Answer next Friday.
Last weeks answer was good old Colin Farrell. Click on QUIZ on the right hand menu for all previous weeks screwed up celebs.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Celebrity Lego Sets
After the success of the Lily Allen Action Figure comes the Michael Jackson Action Set. The perfect Christmas present for any child or adult, from when Michael Jackson was at his Badest. An original one off for your friends to enjoy and laugh along with. With Bubbles!
Email john@friendsofcelebrities.com to snap up the second in the series, before some else does!
Madness and Meltdowns
Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Monday 3rd December 2007
http://www.friendsofcelebrities.com
It’s been a mixed bag of celeb news this week – and it’s all gripping stuff. From the meltdowns of Britney Spears to the Madness of Heather Mills. It’s all here right here…
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True Blue
Madonna was in trouble with animal rights groups this week. She had a flock of sheep dyed the colour blue for a photo shoot. Some people claimed it was just a big publicity stunt. And a Baaaa-d one at that. (Sorry.)
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Britney Pregnant
A Top UK newspaper has exclusively revealed that Britney Spears in expecting her third child. And is completely furious that her secret is out. Exciting!
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Celebrity Lego Sets
Go to the homepage friendsofcelebrities.com to see the latest celebrity lego set. Cool!
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Heather Mills Whinges Again
Sir Paul’s wife was complaining again this week. She was angry because she feels like she has been treated worse than a murderer or a paedophile. Well, at least those two groups of people know when to keep their mouth shut. Why can’t she?
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Winehouse Quits Tour
Some friends of mine went to a Winehouse gig last week and said that it was really a shame to see her drunk, confused and singing badly. They thought it was quite sad
She has pulled out of tour at the cost of half a million pounds. She claims it was because she misses her husband. Ahhh. How romantic. Unlesss your one of the fans who are affected. Although, from the reviews it seems you won’t be missing much.
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Porn and Dope
The DJ know as Grooverider was in trouble this week. He was arrested at Dubai airport after being found with marijuana and hardcore porn. It was hidden in his records. Naughty, naughty.
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Relationships On:
Brian McFadden + Delta Goodrem (getting married)
Naomi Campbell + Lewis Hamilton
Brian Adams + Elle McPherson
Prince Harry + Chelsey Davies (back on already)
Paul McCartney + Rossanna Arquette
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This Weeks Top Celebrity Searches
1. Jessica Alba
2. Cameron Diaz
3. Alicia Keys
4. Paris Hilton
5. Vanessa Hudgens
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Be my friend at www.myspace.com/friendsofcelebrities
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Johnny Depp Film Geek
Johnny was kept busy this week shopping for Christmas gifts in London. Where? Well, where else other than a shop specialising in film memorabilia and toys. Maybe he was buying models of himself in Pirates of the Carribean.
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Doherty Bans Booze
The ex-crack head has banned the rest of his group and everyone on the Babyshambles tour bus from drinking alcohol. The star is worried that the temptation to drink will make him turn to heroin. The band say they’ve been forced to hide bottles of beer under their pillow. Don’t tell Doherty that.
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Wacko Jacko Joins Bros
There are rumours that Michael Jackson will be joining his brothers for The Jacksons re-union. I hope that’s true and if it is I’m definitely booking a ticket. We love the Jacksons!
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Britney Driving Troubles
Britney Spears driver has quit after just two days. He claims being the stars driver was a liability, especially avoiding the paparazzi. However, Britney could be in trouble again after being spotted driving whilst writing a text message on her mobile.
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Guitarist Slash admits he finds strip clubs boring as he’s seen it all (and a lot more) before.
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Brosnan Spared Jail
Pierce Brosnan was not given a jail sentence for allegedly punching a photographer who tried to take a picture of him. The pap claimed Brosnan had shouted at him to ‘get a real job!’
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Mel B Comes Second
Despite support coming strong from the other Spice Girls, Mel B came a plucky second. Her pleas to be embraced by the American public on the top show Dancing with the Stars did not come true. She was pipped to the chequered flag by a racing driver.
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Britney in Shoplift Shock
Poor Brits was back in the headlines. In a Californian sex shop she got angry after not being allowed to try on some ‘barely legal’ underwear. Amazingly, she then took off her own knickers in the middle of the shop and tried them on. Ordered to pay she did but annoyed as she walked out she took a wig off a mannequin and took it with her – without paying. Witnesses said it was like watching a child. Poor Britney.
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Grandma’s in PVC Watch
The Spice Girls Tour was up in the air after Geri’s baby got chicken pox and the girls worried they might catch it too. Good news though, Posh it to become the face of fashion designer Marc Jacobs and pose nude in order to sell his charity t-shirts. But most importantly, my Spice Girls tickets arrived. Yay!
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Blondie Flops
The recent west end show ‘Desperately Seeking Susan’ closed this week after only one month. The show of the film was reworked with Blondie songs and was panned by fans and critics, closing with losses of £3.5 million. Ooooops.
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Please email your stories and tips for the website at john@friendsofcelebrities.com and keep helping the celebs, they need you.
Tell your friends about us, and thanks again for being one of the Friends of Celebrities.
John
Founder of Friends of Celebrities
Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
Can you guess who it is this week? Answer on Friday.
Last weeks answer was OJ Simpson. Check out all the quizzes by clicking right here or on 'QUIZ'.